Ok, I’ll admit it. There are a lot of things in life that I don’t understand. I understand how we get a crescent moon, but the waxing and waning gibbous phases baffle me. I can watch a football or baseball game without the slightest question, but haven’t a clue what’s happening in rugby or cricket. I watch in amazement as my cat pulls open a door that I thought was closed to get outside, but spends 20 minutes navigating his way through the window blind pull-chain. I can drive a stick shift with ease, but have no clue how to change the calendar to eliminate a leap year (ok, not related, but really, they’d have to change a lot of things!). Yet most of these gaps in my knowledge could be bridged by spending a few minutes on Google, and even Bing, if necessary. But one thing I don’t think I’ll ever understand is the mind boggling attraction women have with shopping for footwear. What a phenomenon. It kind of reminds me of one of those black and white horror movies. The one’s where the babe is fascinated with chopping people to bits. With axes and such. Wow.
Yeah, I’m in need of new boots. But unlike the horror film hotties, killing for the sheer pleasure of it, I have a hidden issue striking fear deep inside when the thought of shoe shopping comes up. It’s called “extra wide feet”. So here’s the scoop. I’m slowly but surely pointing my life in the direction of EMS. So far, from the ankles up, I mostly look the part. And recently after finding a perfect fit boot for my left foot (“Haix Airpower”, at the Red Deer “Rocky Mountain Phoenix” emergency equipment center), I thought I had the issue beat. But, no, says my right foot, this boot just won’t do. But wait, it comes in extra wide! So I took back my “Wide” boots and waited for the XW’s to come in. Did they fit? Half of them did. But still, the crushing of my right small toe just won’t do. So this weekend (tomorrow), is shoe shopping in Edmonton. I’m sure I’ll have nightmares about it tonight.
So, if tomorrow evening in Red Deer, strange things happen around town, assume that my excursions went poorly, and I was driven mad at the thought of another minute spent looking. Did I tell you the shoes I wear to work I bought 4 years ago, and have had fixed 3 times instead of buying new ones? I only hope Rocky Mountain Phoenix will be gentle with me when I go back in with my boots, again. EMS footwear is not cheap, I’m telling you!
Ps: maybe a metatarsectomy would be less painful? Hmm.
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